- Attention, CrostCo shoppers! Today only! Big bathroom sale! Stock up now! (limit one)
- Once in the job market, Sonya quickly came to regret having majored in Mesoamerican Transgender Folk Music.
- “No, baked beans are on the previous aisle. See how it works?”
- Just before he choked to death on a roll of TP, the punk in Aisle Six quipped, “Yo, lady! What, did you lose a bet?”
- Reviews were mixed over Hasbro’s new “Make Your Own Mummy” gift idea
- “I’m sorry, but I am not paying $89.95 a roll, I don’t care how fluffy.”
- Look, if you need to test bathroom tissue in public, maybe high prices is not your biggest problem.
- The Republican caucus seemed determined to block Biden’s nominee for “Run To The Border” Czar
- History tells us precious little about Martha Stewart’s early stint in retail sales
- Sick to death of lame scatalogical jokes, Edna concealed her handgun until the moment was ripe.
- “Note to self: never again criticize the boss when he’s drinking.”