- “Why is this truck always in front of me?”
- History tells us precious little about the Pentagon’s “Log Cabin to Nowhere”
- Tired of Congressional opposition on a border wall, President Trump mows down the Petrified Forest
- Reviews were mixed for the latest reboot, “Jurassic Wood World”
- Homeland Security purchases bulk hardwood for switches to spank illegal alien children
- Little did Ed in Whte House procurement realize FDR’s fondness for fireside chats
- Toothpick stocks skyrocket as thousands of dentists suddenly claim flossing causes tooth decay
- Tensions mounted as “Lord of the Rings” director announced Ent auditions
- Facing budget cuts, the iconic Martin Guitars company opts for bulk pine
- Tonight! On an all-new Martha Stewart Holidays! “A Paul Bunyan Thanksgiving”